on signal
i don't talk much. not because i don't have anything to say, but because most things aren't worth saying.
i like to listen. a lot. probably more than people realize.
not the kind of listening where i'm waiting for my turn to speak. the kind where every word matters.
asynchronous, ambient, mostly noise. but sometimes, it's signal.
i wait, for information that matters. if i have a question, i ask. if i don't, i listen.
as a result, i don't initiate much. and it's not because of fear.
it's because i struggle to find reason, value, connection.
truthfully, i don't find many people interesting. not in a bad way.
just in a way that doesn't pull me to start something.
it makes networking awkward. social media feels wrong. talking about my work feels forced.
i prefer the universal language of hard work. progress. value.
the issue: many don't have the right lens to see it.
no matter how much i've accomplished. how much i've learned. i feel like i'm always behind.
i don't publish. don't post. don't promote.
and it's not because i'm hiding. but because i'm too busy doing the thing.
my work doesn't live in my words. it lives in my actions. in what works. in what ships.
my worry is sometimes i feel invisible.
like if you don't look close enough, you'd think there's nothing here.
no progress. no product. no anything.
peering into a sea of noise you don't have the frequency to listen in on.
and maybe that's the problem.
maybe i don't need to shout louder. i just need to shout in a direction others will hear.
to start translating on more common frequencies.
just enough signal to be seen.
— Kevin
i don't build faster because i'm smarter.
i build faster because i have Kernix.